#grounded: a blog series [days 6-10] What is time?

Hey all you Cool Cats and Kittens – another Carol B here just checking in to see how you are all holding up?!

It Is Friday the 10th – my last blog series check in was 5 days ago. I literally have no idea where the time went. 

So much has happened this week and then also nothing at all.

This week has been a gauntlet of emotions and sometimes when that happens it really is hard to put things into words. There are moments when it feels like there isn’t really much to say – and then days where I can’t stop the chatter.  IMG_9267

Here is the thing – I work for a fairly large well known company and I am technically on a leave. Now instead of learning my fate from my company I am learning my fate while watching the news or learning from other people sending my articles. So while we are all going through similar things – my work thing is very public and lots of people not related to my company are talking about it. Today it just seems like it is a lot to take in. 

I feel like I am mentally preparing for a plan B – I can’t decide what that plan b should be. Do I go to journalism school? Do I get certified to teach in Canada? Do I plan to go and teach abroad? Do I even want to do that? Hard to plan when you don’t know what the fate of the world is going to be. 

Anyway here is 20 things week I have done this week:

  1. Successfully avoided publishing anything I wrote because I couldn’t get my thoughts sorted and organized.
  2. Cracked off the remaining 7 gel nails – my hands are looking fucking stellar.
  3. Purchased 4 containers of super colorful hair dye – still looking for gloves so I can dye my hair without dying my hands. 
  4. I just turned the heel on the sock I am knitting – pretty soon I will have a pair.
  5. Looked on the Government website at my tax forms. Did nothing with said forms.
  6. Drank coffee in a parking lot with my friend at a socially distant appropriate distance.
  7. Logged into my Arbonne site and then did nothing with it. Thought about doing things but then did nothing.
  8. Got really into Ozark – because what a crazy fucking ride that shit is.
  9. Cleaned my room, put on candles, made a mess, burned out candles
  10. Read books, meditated and did that again. 
  11. Wondered when I was going to start feeling the way other people are feeling all overwhelmed and shit.
  12. Tried on every one of my toques.
  13. Drove up to Nose Hill more than once to have coffee in my car.
  14. Drank a lot of fizz  (Honestly if no one has given you any of these to try – please let me know they are so damn good  – they are going to replace my Diet Coke addiction)
  15. Drank a lot of tea – all the tea, daily tea
  16. Been in denial about the amount of coffee I am drinking.
  17. Drank a lot of smoothies.
  18. Did some at home workouts – kickboxing, Beachbody and super long river walks.
  19. Made an appointment to get the drivers side door handle fix on my car, and the running light that burnt out months ago
  20.  …. really assessing my life – I have had time to look in and dig deep and consider so many things. Who really knows where this journey is taking me but I have all the time in the world to figure it out. 

 

That is what I have been up to the last few days #grounded. My emotions are raw. My mood is good and bad and good and bad and mostly I feel very hollowingly lonely and single. And that is just where I am at.

 

How is your week going?

hashtag grounded: a blog series ep.5

Well we are almost finished day 5 and I thought I would jump on here an talk about my amazing accomplishments for today:

  1. For probably as long as I can remember I get an email notification that April 6th is Margaret’s birthday. I have no idea who the fuck Margaret is or when I added it to my hotmail calendar for reminders or why I added it. Today I figured out how to delete that reminder.  A very happy birthday to the mystery Margaret person. I probably added you to my calendar when I was high at some point thinking it was important. If you are reading this, you are Margaret and it is your Birthday – we should probably touch base.
  2. I logged in to get my hit @ home kickboxing online workout today – wasn’t my best workout but I got it done.
  3. After taking at least 6 Midol and 6 extra strength Aleve  – eating 2 chocolate chip chocolate muffins, some Reece peanut butter big cups & some mini eggs – I think my cramps might be slowly disappearing into the heavily medicated space.
  4. I have now effectively cracked 3 of my gel nails off – only 7 more to go. I got this. Who needs a nail Lady anyway?
  5. I started looking for a van to buy to convert into a camper. I don’t have money for this – but by gawd I am going to figure this shit out.

 

That is all for today Friends  – Stay Safe, Stay Sanitized and Stay Home