Writers Block. How do you move past it?

I have started and erased this post probably 10 times today because I have thought they were all shit. Today I admit my confidence is not where I want it to be. Tomorrow will be a better day. I don’t want to break a promise I made about trying to write more. Today I am drained, tried, cranky and just can’t.

How do you write through your writers block? How do you push your creative envelop when it feels dry? What do you do when you feel like you are trapped with life?

Today readers, I am asking you … I’d love to chat about creative block, life blocks and shaking things up …

Lets go …..

 

XOXO,

C

 

 

Sorry

Do you ever wish you could just apologize? I mean go back to a time and apologize for doing the shitty things that you did while you were a different person? Sometimes I do.

I am sorry I stole money from you. I am sorry I borrowed money and never paid it back. I am sorry I didn’t know how to say no. I am sorry that I didn’t have the money to pay you back when you wanted. I am sorry I didn’t stand up for myself and say no. I am sorry I came on the trip anyway. I am sorry I made it feel like you needed to pay for me. I am sorry that you needed to take care of me. I am sorry I made it easy for you to steal from my wallet. I am sorry you slept with me so you could steal from my wallet thinking I didn’t know. I am sorry I wasn’t the druggie you wanted me to be when you wanted me to be it. I am sorry for lying to you. I am sorry for giving you my power. I am sorry for taking your power. I am sorry that my words made you feel like shit.  I am sorry for talking behind your back. I am sorry you thought I was needy. I am sorry that I made you get too high. I am sorry for making you party again. I am sorry for treating you less than you deserve. I am sorry for not being the person that you need me to be. I am sorry for bitching all the time. I am sorry that I hurt you. I am sorry that I wanted more. I am sorry that I have to many emotions. I am sorry that I cry all the time. I am sorry I broke a promise to you. I am sorry that I lost touch with you. I am sorry that we grew apart. I am sorry that I can’t afford that. I am sorry that I  have super high standards from my friends. I am sorry that I just cant. I am sorry for leaving you. I am sorry we can’t be friends anymore.

But mostly I am sorry that not sorry for being me.

 

 

Sunday Poetry Slam; Hear Me

When I was in University writing was my life. I took as many creative writing classes as they would let me. I don’t write the same way as I used too. Maybe because the world has changed.  But about a month ago I found a bunch of CDR’S with my old writing on them. I ripped the files onto my computer but just the title of some of them made me scared to wake the beast. I wrote a lot about how drugs made the world better. I wrote a lot about dealing with my family, depression, anxiety, running away, freedom. I was questioning life a lot. I was also a stoner. So what can you do?! Anyway – way back in the day I wanted to publish a book of poetry. I used my creative writing classes to work on my poems – so I thought I would publish here some excerpts of the young Carols life.


 

Hear me shouting

Hear me laughing

Hear me crying

Hear me walking

Hear me running

Hear me as I speak with you hear me as you understand

Hear me in all my silence

Hear me raise my hand

Hear me slumped over the table

Hear me in the corner

Hear me as I fall and hear me as I hurt

Hear me, but don’t command

Hear me through all my pain

Hear me in the joy

Hear me it’s what I need

Hear me

I hear you


 

It is funny how easy it is for me now to analyze what young Carol was thinking but how at the time I thought I was being so evasive. I was just as normal as everyone else, I just didn’t know how to deal with normal emotions. Once I go through all my poems I will start throwing down some new work.

Happy Sunday,

XOXO

C

Sunday Poetry Slam

When I was in University writing was my life. I took as many creative writing classes as they would let me. I don’t write the same way as I used too. Maybe because the world has changed.  But about a month ago I found a bunch of CDR’S with my old writing on them. I ripped the files onto my computer but just the title of some of them made me scared to wake the beast. I wrote a lot about how drugs made the world better. I wrote a lot about dealing with my family, depression, anxiety, running away, freedom. I was questioning life a lot. I was also a stoner. So what can you do?! Anyway – way back in the day I wanted to publish a book of poetry. I used my creative writing classes to work on my poems – so I thought I would publish here some excerpts of the young Carols life. My palindrome on life.


 

Who says there need be some Justification for life?

Bothered– like a scorpion sting in the night

The feeling meanders over time

Elusiveness, daunting – menacing, growing and moving on

The knowledge and unworthiness presented in panic

Incapable of succeeding

The trepidation that life won’t come together

I hear the condescending tone

Life taking the turn

The willingness to give in

 

The willingness to give in

Life taking the turn

I hear the condescending tone

The trepidation that life won’t come together

Incapable of succeeding

The knowledge and unworthiness presented in panic

Elusiveness, daunting – menacing, growing and moving on

The feeling meanders over time

Bothered-like a scorpion sting in the night

Who says there need be some Justification for life?